Sunday, August 29, 2004

Feel the vibe coming from my jam box

I'm back at my parents' house. My month-long residency at The Drake is over and I no longer have any excuse for my pubes to be on one of the beds there. 'Twas quite the time. Very little shaminess occurred, unfortunately, and as my adulthood continues to be more noticeable, I won't be able to indulge in much shameyness without being anything but a gross dude, so really, I should deal with shameyness now while I'm the least gross I will ever be.

Speaking of gross, gross words flowed from my mouth at the L'Afterparty on wednesday the 25th, but it went great. I did about 35 minutes--definitely my longest set. I'd had a newspaper article earlier that,
and I was surprised at some of the people it brought out. People I went to highschool with, friends of my family and more all came out, and I'm assuming some were disgusted and now hate me and think I'm "weird".

Actually, the turnout was phenomenal for this event, considering I didn't try to make a hugey-huge deal out of it, and luckily I thought I represented myself comedically as best I could. Then the band played and it was weird we were at the Drake.

I loved seeing all the acts at l'afterparty...Panzram's Ghosts ruled nicely. And Makesi Arthur was so funny. I liked the video but I hate showing videos at events. Is that weird?

I swear to god if eat any more fusion food I will cut off my balls with a letter opener and shove them down the throat of the nearest sellout Japanese chef.

Upcoming shows:
Tonight, old york tavern, 9 30 PM. I'll be on early so show up if it so floats. your boat.

Beyond that, I'm hosting a show at Rancho Relaxo on the first friday in September. And I think I'm MCing the Paper Bag records anniversary show, which may be the same day as Toronto's first Kool Keith concert in awhile, in which case compromises must be reached.

And the next L'Afterparty is Friday October 8 at Rancho!

So until then, keep fucking.

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Could I Be Any More Ready? yes, but won't be

So I have about 8 hours until L'Afterparty, and let me tell you, I am excited but a bit freaked out, because in an effort not to repeat my jokes too heavily, I'm trying to write as much as possible, and so am feeling stressed that I won't be able to write everything in time. It'll be fine though.
So this stay at the Drake has been good, because it's provided me with a lot of alone time, and thus I have had a lot of orgasms. Also, the delicious food has been just that and I haven't overdone it. I still have a couple of more days left to party down and snack. 'Twill rule. I got a copy of the new R.Kelly album the other day, along with the Snoop/Nate Dogg/Warren G album 213 and the new Beatnuts. All three are good, but especially the new Kells. I'm starting to realise he is called the 'piper' because of the pipes in his throat, and not due to the pipe he shoves in underdeveloped throats. How old is R.Kelly? He must be getting up there in age. That would make sense because his subject matter is becoming oddly old-timey. The man exists in a make-believe universe only he completely understands, but I love that universe, although I wish we could excise the part where he corrupts the very young from that universe. Anyway, magic things haven't majorly gone down since these Drake times began. I have drank fancy drinks and DJ'd rad tunes to the uncaring masses that spend time here. Also, I have questioned my validity as a person. Always good to do. Here is L'Afterparty info.

L'Afterparty, Drake Hotel, Wednesday August 25, 9 30, PWYC
video by JARED SALES and

if you're a comedian reading this, if I have time afterward I'll be giving peeps some time for a comedy jam to close out the eve, so feel free to c'mon down. Hope it goes well.

Sunday, August 08, 2004

The next impression that will be done expertly by many comedians will be F. Murray Abraham

Or not. I don't actually know. But he is a hilarious character actor who doesn't get the credit he deserves, in terms of being over-the-top when onscreen. Pardon me for not putting up info about the bunch of shows I just did, but my ass has been busy and confused; since moving into the Drake, I've felt like I've been trying to keep up with the stuff I am obliged to do, and so haven't had time to write in this son of a beyotch "blog". I'm sure you all are anxiously awaiting my never-ending recollections of an uneventful tour, so I'll try to write some shit about that. For now, here's some show info:

Doing a set at the old york tavern around 10 PM today, sunday August 15--it's at tecumseth south of snake from degrassi will be there.

L'Afterparty feat. me, Makesi Arthur, Knock Knock Who's There Comedy, Panzram's Ghost, Brutal Knights and a short by Jared Sales. PWYC@ The Drake Hotel, Wed. Aug 25

Sorry this entry sucks. I'll try to make up for it by washing your car or ass.